Joanne McNally played a blinder on The Celebrity Traitors. Here are 15 of her best lines

By remembering to be funny, the Irish comedian proved an excellent booking on the BBC show

Thu Oct 29 2026 - 21:37 • 4 MIN READ

So near, yet so far. Joanne McNally, having played a blinder throughout, has come a cropper in the penultimate episode of The Celebrity Traitors.

Banished at the round table after YouTuber (and traitor) King Kenny switched his vote, the Irish comedian is no longer in the running to win money for her chosen charity in the BBC show’s endgame. But by understanding the assignment, proving excellent value for viewers and securing airtime in nine out of a maximum of 10 episodes in this ratings juggernaut, she won anyway.

Along the way, she wasn’t afraid to showcase her “performative stupidity” – her self-declared strategy for survival – as she outlined a series of incorrect game theories. But on this show, being wrong can be a canny self-protection mechanism that reduces your chances of being murdered because you’re a “threat”.

Cast as a faithful, the stand-up and podcaster also quickly decided that the best thing to do would be to attract a little “heat” to avoid being murdered as an “obvious” faithful, but not quite enough to be banished at the round table as a suspected traitor. That worked – up to a point.

Most importantly, McNally never forgot that she and everybody else in the cast are, in the words of The Rest is Entertainment hosts Richard Osman and Marina Hyde, “light-entertainment bookings”.

Starting with her over-the-top “wedding” entrance, she set about delivering a string of tension-defusing one-liners and comic asides that had her new celebrity pals in stitches laughing. It bodes well for her already-booming ticket sales in Britain.

Here are 15 of her best lines from the show:

“I’m a single woman on dating apps. Do you know how much lying goes into that? Yesterday I told a man I enjoyed nature and glassblowing.”

– The reason why she would make a great traitor, as told to presenter Claudia Winkleman. She wasn’t chosen and later changed her mind about her aptitude for the traitor’s life.

“This is me with men all the time. I completely believed him.”

– After failing to vote to banish obvious traitor Richard E Grant, McNally swiftly moved into comedic mode.

“I don’t ever plan to marry so I walked down the aisle slowly, with people looking at me. I enjoyed it.”

– Her explanation for why she smiled and waved gratuitously as she entered the church before meeting her fellow contestants in the first episode.

“If I was Claudia, I wouldn’t pick you . . . I just don’t think she’d trust you with that job.”

– The burn inflicted while playing pool with comedian (and occasional sparring partner) Romesh Ranganathan.

“Having Maya there was a great comfort. In fact, when I get buried for real I might ask Maya to come into the ground with me for a period of time until I get settled.”

– Her verdict on being buried alive in a coffin with Love Island presenter Maya Jama.

“Female friendship means a lot to me. Even if they are a serial killer in the evening.”

– On why she just couldn’t join in the herd voting to banish Hannah Fry, a traitor, at the round table.

“I would follow that man into a bubbling volcano.”

– Her feelings towards actor Michael Sheen, specifically in relation to his authority at the round table.

“He has not blinked since we’ve been here. He is giving cyborg.”

– On being suspicious that former EastEnders actor and all-round television “hard man” Ross Kemp was a traitor. (He was not.)

“Jerry’s amazing, but she’s planted more seeds than a farmers’ market.”

– On why she voted to banish “chaotic” Jerry Hall, thinking she was a traitor. (She was not.)

“The gloves don’t help . . . They’re like proper Cruella de Vil vibes. I can smell gasoline from the lantern on them. I can smell Rob’s blood.”

– Her advice to glove-wearing Leigh-Anne Pinnock as the pop star tried to prove she was a faithful and hadn’t murdered comedian Rob Beckett face-to-face.

“Once I leave here I don’t know how I’m going to get this paranoia out of my brain. I’ll be accusing my cats of crimes they didn’t commit.”

– On being certain that Leigh-Anne was a traitor. (She was not.)

“This is like a really weird gender-reveal party.”

– Her first impression of a field of gothic scarecrows, aka “the field of screams”, as the contestants were brought to the site of one of the show’s horror-styled missions.

“She’s too hot. The hot ones always survive.”

– Her theory as to why Maya Jama hadn’t been murdered. (As a traitor, Jama couldn’t be murdered.)

“Oh my god, this is awful. Hi, my name’s Joanne. I’m a Taurus.”

– After a tied round-table vote, when she had to formally plead her case, she started with an icebreaker joke.

“It has been one of the best experiences of my adult life. I actually feel emotional . . . I’m pre-menstrual.”

– The banished McNally revealed to the table that she was “a hardcore faithful”. This time it was everybody else’s turn to be wrong.

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